Can you make him only have eyes for me?
Can you make her leave her current boyfriend and come to me?
Why doesn’t he love me anymore?
Can you make them fall in love with me?
Almost every other tarot reading is about a person’s love life. Almost every other request for a spell is to make someone fall in love with them. Can I give them the spell or candle to make help them do this. Yes I can. Do I? No. Why? I have learned the hard way that it is not the best idea to force another to be with you.
Example 1; I was 15 and madly in love with my "soul mate" and begged God to let me be with that person forever. I prayed almost every minute of every day. I read my tarot cards and prayed over The Lovers to gain what that card meant. What happened? I got what I asked for. I got pregnant at 16 and when our son was almost 6 months old he left us. He was not ready to be a Dad or a husband. He was only 16 himself. So now we are stuck together as long as our son is alive. If you haven’t figured it out by now he was NOT my soul mate and in all honesty, I cannot stand him as a person. He is very self-centered and needy and has been all these years. My white light tells me to be understanding and compassionate but you know how hard that can be with people you just don’t get along with.
Example 2; I married at 19. I had another child. Why? I wanted someone to take care of me. Or so I thought. I really just wanted out of the house. Away from the codependency I had with my mom. (Does that mean it was her fault I made this decision? Of course not. I made my choices and blame no one.) When we moved out I realized I wasn’t in love with this person and actually we weren’t even compatible. Again I asked the divine to help me. He sent me another man and in my early twenties I was divorced and lost temporary custody of my 2 children. Everyone but I saw what this man was and what he was capable of, except me. I became consumed with saving this man and it slowly destroyed who I was. In anguish over being alone and without my children I cast a spell. I cut a lemon in 2, wrote on a piece of paper that I wanted to be with him forever and sealed the paper between the lemon halves with pins. At the time did I know that a lemon is sour and in magickal working can cause things to go sour? Nope. Did I know that using pins can bring pain and even blood shed when used in magickal workings? Nope. I was young and didn’t do my homework and sure enough I buried that lemon under a tree and got what I wanted. Four years of domestic violence and a child. By the time she was almost 2 I had gotten custody of my kids back and I RAN from him throwing him in jail for the last time.
Example 3; I got my own place, went back to school. Slowly I got to know who I was again. After a few years of pulling myself together and making my kids’ lives more stable, more about them and their happiness and less about me and my own. By making them happy I became happy. I noticed the world through a different set of eyes. One night I got lonely but this time I asked for something very simple. When the time was right would the Divine please give me a good man, a man who would love me and my children unconditionally. There was no rush for me to have him, I can take care of myself and my kids without a man. I placed my want in the hands of the universe. What happened? About a year later in a class I met him. We have not left each other’s side since the last day of that class. We have been together almost 10 years now. He is a stay at home Dad and helps me raise all 5 of our kids. Now I’m not saying things have been easy or perfect. We have our moments. We get angry or upset. The electricity gets turned off because we are broke or we are rushing around getting to work or getting the kids to school or soccer. But there is love. It binds us together as a couple and as a family. We turn to each other in our darker moments and forgive the random irritation of each other’s words. It’s not a fairytale but it’s our love for each other and our family that keeps us happy and strong.
How did it happen? I let go of trying to control everything. Previously, I tried to control God and told Him what I felt was best for me. I then tried to have a relationship without love just to suite my own needs, and finally I tried to control the Universe and make it do what I wanted by casting spells without knowing what the hell I was doing.
I learned, I grew and I let go and let Divinity take over. I have learned to do this in all fashions of my life. Work, bills, money, family issues so an and so on. I do it for everything and it magickaly works and keeps me sane. Any spell you see me create is to help a person ask the Divine for guidance. They ask for Goddess or God to help when you truly need the help. Nothing I conjure up is to force things to happen. If you want it to happen, then just ask them and then let it go. If the cards and your intuition are telling you it's not meant to be then listen to the Universe. Who are we to tell the Divine they are wrong? Who are we to try and control another human beings destiny through magick?